Loved a lot; Learned a lot

4 months, 4 glorious months I have been able to stay home with my sweet little boy.

Grady is my baby boy, but he is so much more than that.  He has been my constant companion and my buddy for the past four months.  We have navigated an entirely new world together; Grady's first months on earth and my first months as a mom.  We shared many laughs, tears, smiles, and memories. From putting on diapers to putting a carseat in a grocery cart, we figured it out together.  I will leave Grady safely in the arms of his nanny this week probably with some tears as I head to work, but I am confident that he knows that I am his mommy and I will race home on Monday to see the little boy that I know God picked out just for Chris and me.  He is mine and I am his forever.

Grady, I have loved and learned so much over these past four months:

• I loved how you made your entrance into this world on your own terms surprising us a week early.
• I loved how we broke out of the the hospital feeling like rebels at 10:30 at night because we were so eager to show you your home and to start our own family time. 
• I loved how you were so skinny that all your clothes looked like robes on you.
• I loved smelling your sweet breath our second night home when the only way you would sleep was with our faces inches away sharing the same air.
• I loved seeing how much our whole family instantly loved you showering you with tears, sweet kisses, and wrinkly eyed smiles. 
• I loved watching every.single.Olympic event with you.  Your timing was impeccable allowing me to combine the two weeks of the Olympics with your first two weeks of not doing much at home.
• I loved our daily walks and sitting outside on the patio on those wonderful hot summer nights just staring at each other.
• I loved pacing the hallway together cheek on cheek during your short lived midnight cuddle and feeding sessions. 
• I loved skipping down to your room every morning when you finally decided to wake up. 
• I loved seeing you strrrrrrretch every morning when I released your from your baby straight jacket otherwise known as a swaddle blanket. 
• I loved our morning time together, you on your blanket and me on the fireplace with coffee in hand.  I loved how that time evolved into our little coffee talk hour full of coos and screeches of delight.  I will look forward to coffee talk, the weekend edition, with great anticipation. 
• I loved throwing a "daddy is home" party with you every single day. 
• I loved our story time together.
• I loved seeing you and Bella begin to become friends knowing that in the years to come you two will be buds.
• I loved hearing your sweet little sleepy hmmms while you sweetly slept in my arms.
• I loved introducing you to Priest Lake, Seattle, and Maui. 
• I loved every grin, coo, or happy squeal that you threw my way. 
• I LOVED every minute of this very special time with you. I was lucky to have it and I will always treasure these 4 months, our 4 months. 

• I learned that there is never any one right answer when it comes to parenting. 
• I learned to trust my gut. 
• I learned to not worry about the things that I cannot change.
• I learned that sometimes I will have to apologize to you for getting it wrong and that is OK. 
• I learned that you have a wonderful father. 
• I learned that reading the same book 10 times over gets a little boring. 
• I learned that infants can cry louder than I ever imagined.  
• I learned that you are your own baby and there is no sense in comparing you to any other wonderful little baby. 
• I learned that I love being a mom and that being called a good mom is the best compliment I have ever received.

I learned to love in a way that I never knew possible and I have you to thank for that.  Thanks for making me a mom little one. Thanks for sharing the sweetest four months of my life and for being patient with me over the next month as I navigate a whole new world once again; the world of being a working mom.

A little tribute to my time at home with Grady: